Who am I?

     I became annoyed with one of my favorite authors the other day. His first non-fiction book was released and I couldn't wait to read it. I wanted to hear more about the man. Instead, what I was reading was mostly book reviews, book intros, and speeches. I wanted more about what the man thought and felt, instead what I got was what he felt about someone else. He even had a chapter with the title, "Who am I" but it was about how different public impressions of authors are often different that the authors themselves, and it was about Terry Pratchett and not Mr. Gaiman. I got so annoyed about hearing about everyone else, that I was annoyed with the book and it's author. I stepped back for a day and I began thinking, that maybe the best way for a writer to explain himself is by explaining his influences. I know that I am just a continuing extension of my past. People and events have accumulated into one me. No one shares all of my past. It is all me.
    So who am I? I am the product of two people who are still in love after almost 60 years together. They raised me with a strong sense of independence and freedom. I can be anyone I want because I am that strong. I have siblings with handicaps who taught me that asking for help doesn't diminish your strength. (I know this to be true, but it is still a hard lesson for me.) I grew up trying to remember to think ahead and that I was smarter than I was willing to believe.
    When I was younger, school left me with doubts about my abilities. But it taught me that there were all kinds of people and so there must be a place for me somewhere. When I got older I learned that I wasn't quite the misfit that I felt, or rather that everyone is. Sometimes I think that not fitting in, is a true gift. It teaches you how to stand alone, and you see the crowds differently than you could if you were part of them.
     Adulthood has taught me that it's okay to not have much but the sense of accomplishment that you get from everything you accomplish will mean much more. You can tell kids this all day long but they will never understand it.
    I have been supported by an amazing bunch of people, who enjoy entertaining new ideas and show respect and tolerance for almost anything that doesn't harm anyone else. I have had amazing men in my life who make me feel that my heart and soul is to be respected and loved.
My world is mine, but it is filled with others. I can stand alone, but I hope I never have to.