It's okay to be fake

       I "unfriended" my first group of Facebook friends today. I've been on FB for seven years so I've had a pretty good run. I really do appreciate the diversity of my friends, I like the idea that there is no way that this group of people could possibly get along, but they all like me, or maybe we just share a history, it doesn't really matter. I have even fantasized about what would happen if these people met. What sort of politeness would be created? How much conversation would actually happen before it broke down. No matter what their views are I think of my friends as being very real. They don't hide who they are. If you are conservative then your words should speak to that. If your liberal then your words should reflect your opinions. I know that opposites can and do get along. It is a simple matter of respect. You don't have to agree with someone to let them speak their mind without backlash. I agree that it is important to challenge the standards, to shake things up now and then, but I don't believe that needs to bring someone else down.
     In this case, my problem was several members of a family were having a fight on Facebook. I just felt like I was watching something very ugly. I am not disillusioned enough to think that everyone gets along whether it be with siblings or anyone else. My thought is why do you need to take it a public event? I firmly believe that most high drama events are fueled not just by its participants but also by the audience. I simply chose to make the audience one less.
     I'm afraid we even have political campaigns where the goal isn't creating a platform, but tearing apart your opponent's. It is sad and frightening when we are are starting a voting process by guessing which will do the least damage.
     We currently have a very popular phrase,"keeping it real." I think this has become a method to defend actions that used to be unacceptable. We used to be told that good manners paid off, but I feel that today's culture is attempting to change that. Saying that "I'm sorry," doesn't make you wrong, it makes you understanding. It's time to say that sometimes being fake is okay because it can make you a more real compassionate person. I'm going to try and watch my tongue and remember the phrase "if you have nothing nice to say don't say anything at all."

Trigger Warning

       I first ran across the term "Trigger Warning" as a Neil Gaiman title. He explained that a trigger warning is used by an author to warn the reader that they might find something offensive within the piece. I like this idea. I am never trying to offend anyone, but I am opinionated and quite prone to rants. Like anyone else I want to elaborate on things that I feel passionate about. The problem is that when we are passionate the head doesn't always rule. I want all of the facts, but quite often my mind is made up before I have all available facts.
     I am working on such a rant, but rants do go off subject quite often. My rants are forever rambling in the low parts of my mind. I think sharing these things does quite often alleviate some of our difficulty. We sort through anger, embarrassment, and judgement. The simple act of reflection means that the level of immediacy is somewhat dissipated.  Socrates said that the unexamined life wasn't worth living. The over-examined life is almost as unpleasant. To debate over every word spoils the fun. Maybe everyone should be given a trigger warning. I think that I need a dozen t-shirts that simply say, "I'm opinionated, beware."